Medium Is Saving My Life

Day 29

Perhaps that’s too dramatic. Perhaps it’s not. I do know this: Medium has given me an outlet that I desperately needed. It has given me advice, laughs, and challenges. It has made me think, cry and most importantly, write. I have stalked my stats, responded to posts I hated and loved, gained followers and found leaders. I’m finding my voice while falling in love with so many others.

It has kept me sane during social, political, psychological and cultural insanity. I’ve affected strangers in ways I’ve never thought imaginable. They have returned the favor. I’ve expressed myself in ways that I didn’t know possible. The number of fucks I give about what people think has drastically reduced (the number almost rhymes with “hero” but probably, ironically, still rhymes with “at least none,” which is better than the a million I used to give). The number of fucks I give about my role in this world has drastically increased. I found pleasure here. I find meaning here. I found advocacy here. I found comedy here. I found poetry here. I found me here.

Medium invited me into its membership program. I politely declined but appreciated the gesture nonetheless. Medium called me a top writer. Probably a mistake, but once again, I appreciate the gesture. When I feel like these words are for no one. When I feel like this doesn’t matter, I remember this. It gives me confidence. It makes me feel like pushing one more day. One more sentence. Shit, give it one more word.

Because when depression comes knocking and the anxiety won’t stop, I’ve got an outlet. I’ve got purpose. It’s here. My training is here. I’m here. Medium is home — for now. I appreciate Medium letting me rent a one bedroom in this spacious and luxurious profile that I get to fill with my ideas and thoughts — FOR FREE. The only currency I need is respect and love. And I respect it and love it. So to Medium, thank you.

-EB